Seeing the Whole Autistic Person

About the Author

Brenda Dater, MSW, MPH, is the executive director at AANE and the author of “Parenting Without Panic.” Brenda is a mom of three, and her eldest is an Autistic woman. Brenda has facilitated parent support groups for over 20 years and thoroughly enjoys creating an environment where parents can find the support, information, and the community they need.

When we talk about a person’s identity, it can be easy to focus on simple categories in silos: Autism. Mental health. Gender identity. Race. Disability. But real lives aren’t lived in neat boxes one at a time. Intersectionality is a way of understanding how different parts of a person’s identity come together to shape their experiences. For many in our community, those intersections are not just theoretical. They show up in everyday life and impact how they navigate the world.

Often, conversations around intersectionality focus on identities like race, gender, and sexuality, which are significant aspects of all of our lives. But there are other identities that shape how people experience the world and the systems around them that are critical to recognize if we are to increase meaningful understanding and support.

Aging

One of those identities is age. At AANE, we are hearing more from Autistic adults over the age of 50, and from their parents as well. Some weren’t identified as Autistic until later in life. Others have understood their neurology for many years and are now facing new questions as they get older. What we’re hearing is consistent: many feel overlooked.

Most services for Autistic people are designed for children and young adults. Aging services are rarely created with neurodivergence in mind. People are left with neither system fully understanding them or meeting their needs.

Autistic older adults are often navigating changes in health, energy, or executive functioning. Social connections can shift. For some, that means more isolation. Healthcare can be difficult to navigate, especially when providers are not familiar with communication or sensory differences.

Multiple Disabilities

We also see similar challenges for those living at the intersection of multiple disabilities. Many people we hear from are trying to access support and are told they do not quite fit. If someone has a mental health diagnosis, they may be told they are not eligible for autism services. If they have an autism diagnosis, they may struggle to find mental health providers who understand how to work effectively with Autistic adults. People are asked to fit into separate systems, even when their lives do not.

What is needed are services and providers who can respond to the total person. That includes mental health care that is responsive to neurodivergence, and autism-informed supports that recognize how needs evolve over time. At AANE, programs like LifeNet are one way we are working to help people build and sustain the kinds of relationships and support networks that make it easier to navigate these challenges.

This is what intersectionality asks of us. Not to sort people into categories, but to design support that reflects the multiple aspects of who people are and how people actually live.

As we prepare for our Spring Symposium on Intersectionality in Neurodivergent Lives, we are looking forward to conversations that move us in that direction.

If you are interested in learning more, I hope you will join us.