A Story of an Early ADHD Diagnosis: From Childhood Support to Adult Advocacy

About the Author

Molly Gammon, AANE, Learning Coordinator, is a recent graduate of Clark University with a Bachelor’s in Psychology and a Master’s in Communications. She has worked for AANE since January of 2023, but has had an interest in learning more neurodivergence since being diagnosed with ADHD at the age of nine years old. At AANE, Molly supports the Learning Department by coordinating and scheduling presentations and events.

Key Takeaways

• An early ADHD diagnosis can open the door to school accommodations, like extra time on tests, that help a child reach their potential.
• Children who don’t fully understand their diagnosis may feel singled out or different from their peers, so clear, age-appropriate explanations matter as much as the supports themselves.
• Open, ongoing conversations about ADHD, including its strengths like creativity, compassion and perseverance, can help a child build self-understanding and grow into a confident self-advocate.

At an early age my parents and teachers would describe me as a loud, creative child that was a good friend to have. However, I was easily distracted, I struggled with organization and processing information, which made staying on task at school and at home an almost impossible feat no matter how hard I was trying.

In classroom settings, I always remember standing out, whether I wanted to or not. I’ve been told that at the age of 3 or 4 in my preschool classroom I would reach the top of the stairs and announce to all who were listening, “I’m here!!” As if to say, “I have arrived, and now we can get this show on the road.”

There were other times when I didn’t want to stand out. I remember multiple instances getting caught staring out the window or humming along to something. At the time, I thought humming was something only you could hear inside your head. My teacher would call me out in front of the class for not paying attention, and I could feel my face get hot as I slunk back into my chair. 

By this time my parents were aware that I had struggles in school, and they were seeing these struggles at home: not being able to focus on the task in front of me, forgetting to do my homework packet that was assigned at the beginning of the week. Getting frustrated and annoyed with myself and not being able to communicate what I was feeling effectively led to many arguments at the kitchen table.

Finally, when I was at the end of 3rd grade, my teacher advocated for me and my parents at a staff meeting at school to have me tested, which didn’t happen until I was in 4th grade. 

I have a hard time remembering the testing process, but the memories that do come back are that it was a long, drawn-out process that left me feeling drained and frustrated. Looking back, I think that feeling of frustration came from not really understanding what the testing was for and why I was pulled out of class for a test that none of my peers had to take.

So finally in 2008, at the age of nine, after going through testing with the school and after conversations my parents had with my pediatrician, I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). (ADD is no longer a diagnosis, and the official term is now Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder [ADHD], so I will use that to reflect this updated terminology. )

After more meetings and back and forth my parents had to endure with my teacher, specialist and school admin, I was given a 504 Plan, meaning I would receive accommodations in school such as preferential setting, extra time on tests, the option to provide answers verbally instead of written and the ability to take standardized tests in a small group setting. These accommodations would last until I was in high school and some of which would carry over to college. I am incredibly grateful that I was able to receive these accommodations, especially extra time on tests, because they helped me achieve my potential at school. Before this, I struggled with reading the questions fully before answering or would miss key details. Getting the extra time allowed me to stop and process the information completely before responding and allowed me to not feel as rushed to answer. However, at the time, this did cause some questions from friends in later elementary school and middle school because I would have to stay after class to finish or would be separated for standardized tests. This would cause some of the feelings of embarrassment about my ADHD since I wasn’t fully open to my friends at the time about my diagnosis. 

When I was nine, I didn’t have a solid concept of what ADHD was or why I had it even when my parents tried to explain that it was the reason I was having so much trouble in school and at home, which some of my friends didn’t seem to experience. I didn’t want to tell my friends about my diagnosis because it was seen as a fault or shameful, even though that is not true. I never really was told that this was something to be embarrassed about looking back, but at that age not having a complete understanding of what ADHD is, I couldn’t help but let those thoughts of “othering” creep in.

A few months after my diagnosis, I was put on ADHD medication and I noticed the change almost immediately. I could focus better, I was less talkative in class where it wasn’t appropriate and I was learning to become more organized. As I got older and reached the end of middle school and high school, I started advocating for myself and my needs. I was finally able to complete homework without all of the frustration I was feeling before and I was starting to excel in certain subjects.

At this time I also started becoming more interested in what ADHD was and how it affected me as well as the experiences of other people. This early interest led into my fascination with psychology and how brains worked. 

I am not sure if I would have pursued a Bachelors Degree in Psychology or advocacy work without my early diagnosis. It led me to seek out my own research for things that I didn’t understand about myself and want to provide better knowledge to other children and people who had experiences like me. It also helped me identify strategies that help me focus early on that led to greater success in school, such as fidget toys or listening to music during quiet time in middle/high school (when I had teachers that allowed it) that let me concentrate on “one noise” rather than being distracted by multiple different noises or sounds happening at once (i.e. the pencil sharpener, other students walking by, the clock ticking.)  

Although I am grateful for my early diagnosis of ADHD there are a lot of things that could have been better explained to me at a young age that would have helped me feel less alone and confused as to why I “was like this.” This is no fault of my parents or the other adults around me, but I felt like I was not given full understanding as to why I was taken out of class to be tested, why I had ADHD. It felt like many things were being done to me instead of for me. Later I would come to realize that this diagnosis did help me, but it was hard to see it at the time. It helped me to be able to receive the accommodations at school and also opened up my interests into how the brain works. But at the same time it did make me feel “different” in comparison to my friends when I was at the age I was diagnosed. However, I think not being told about my diagnosis would have amplified those feelings tenfold because I would not have any understanding of why I was given extra support or took medication. It took until around the beginning of high school when some of my new friends opened up to me about having ADHD as well that I realized that I wasn’t the only one in my peer group that had some of the same struggles I did. 

Now, as an adult, I have a much better understanding of ADHD and that it is not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. Whether someone is early diagnosed or late diagnosed, we are all worthy of receiving support and acceptance that is neuro-affirming and based on our own individualized needs. To any parents of young ADHD’ers reading this, I would like you to know how incredibly important it is to be open and honest with your children about ADHD and allow them space to ask questions. This should be an ongoing conversation as your child grows older and their ability to comprehend their diagnosis and how ADHD can present itself changes with age. With better understanding hopefully they will not have some of the negative experiences I had, and so many other young girls had. There are many positives about having ADHD as well such as creativity, compassion and perseverance that need to be talked about too.

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FAQs

What school accommodations can help a child with ADHD?
Children with attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) may qualify for a 504 Plan, which provides accommodations at school. Common examples include preferential seating, extra time on tests, the option to answer questions verbally, and taking standardized tests in a small group. These supports can give a child the time and space to process information fully, and some may continue into college.

How should parents talk to their child about an ADHD diagnosis?
Be open and honest, and give your child room to ask questions. Explain why testing, accommodations or other supports are happening, so they feel those supports are done for them rather than to them. Keep the conversation going as your child grows, since their understanding of ADHD will change with age, and talk about the strengths of ADHD as well as the challenges.

Why might a child feel confused about an ADHD diagnosis?
Young children often notice when they are treated differently from their peers. Being pulled out of class for testing or staying late to finish tests can make them feel singled out, especially if they don’t fully understand why. Clear explanations, and meeting peers with similar experiences, can help children see that ADHD is nothing to be ashamed of.